Thursday, February 24, 2011

One Liners

"Today my mom did her hair curly.  Like on Sunday."

(Talking about The Little Mermaid)  "She's a whale now."

(Still talking about The Little Mermaid)  "She's beautiful.  I love her."

Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Just another conversation

A 4 year old guy to a 3 year old guy,

"We use to have that."

"Now it's lost."

"It's in lost city."

"If we were dead we could find it."

Friday, February 18, 2011

"Dirty" Joke

Last night a mom was picking up her little girl and was chatting for a little bit.  After my son had told her a few jokes, she asked him, "Do you want to hear a dirty joke?"

And she waited for him to answer.

Which he wasn't going to do anytime soon, he turned to me and his face was red.  He was confused.  So was I.  Now I've known this lady for a while and am pretty sure that I know what her standards are ... but still, when someone asks you that ...

She starts to laugh and tells us, "A pig fell in the mud."

Well it's dirty and got us all laughing.

Wednesday, February 16, 2011

When I Grow Up

From one of my piano students:  "When I grow up, I want to be an actor.  Cause being the director, that would be boring to boss people around all day."

Tuesday, February 15, 2011


This morning a little guy tells me, "Tamra, I'm not going to be whiny today."

Not less than 10 seconds later he asks what's for breakfast.  I tell him oatmeal.  Instantly, the same little guy has a high pitched tone and whines, "IIII don't waaaant oatmeal!"

Monday, February 14, 2011


This weekend I -finally- got my wetsuit altered.  The legs and arms were too long.  While we're waiting, of course we find something that's a good price that we're going to buy.  $30 - pretty good price for what we're getting.  When we go to pay, the owner tells us not to worry about the alterations, he'll throw that in along with our purchase.  I look at him and ask, "Are you sure?"  He smiles and tells me yes. 

As we're walking through the parking lot, I tell Dustin, "Wow.  I'm a pretty tough negotiator, aren't I?"

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

Sunday, February 13, 2011


Today at church, there were a few funny things I had to pass on:

Imagine a family sitting in a pew.  From left to right, you have (main players) dad, mom, and a little guy.  The little guy is throwing things into the aisle.  The dad finally has his fill and stands up, scoots past his pregnant wife, and towards the little guy.  The little guy looks up and sees his dad coming.  Right before he gets scooped up he utters, "Uh-oh."

Another family in a different row.  Main players again left to right, dad, mom, teenage son, and his friend that's a girl.  So during the meeting, the son keeps flirting with the girl - whispering about this and that.  The mom taps her son on the shoulder and tells him to pay attention.  His response, "I am."  And goes back to talking to the girl.

So now we're in Sunday school.  While a lady is talking, I notice that she has the same exact hair color as the lady sitting next to her.  I quietly whisper to my husband, "Hey look - they use the same hair dye."  My step-brother-in-law (how weird is that title?) is sitting in front and me and turns his head sideways to tell me, "I heard that."  Busted.

Saturday, February 12, 2011

The story of a black hoodie & a mint

My son has a black hoodie that he never gets the chance to wear because his mother usually has it on.  Yes, even in the house since the humidity here has me freezing while everyone else is above comfortable temperatures.  (During the week I can get away with the furnace up higher - can't have sick kiddies can I?)

About a month ago my son walks up to me and tells me to check my pocket.  I know there isn't anything in my pocket.  So I tell him so.  Again he tells me to check my pocket.  I stop whatever I'm doing and look at him.  Okay, I'll check my pocket.  There is something in my pocket.  A Pearson's Mint Pattie.  :)  My son giving me one of his treasured mints. 

Fast forward a week later and we're off to cub scouts.  Since my daughter is the opposite of me with body temperature controls, she didn't bring a jacket and gets cold.  After a few minutes of her shivering, I offer her the black hoodie.  She gladly takes it. 

The next day - where is my, I mean my son's, hoodie?  Sigh.  Will I ever see it again?
That was 3 weeks ago.  Saturday morning rolls around and we're off to the church to see if I can find the black hoodie.  We look on all of the coat racks, nope - not showing up.  Can't get to lost and found, the library is locked.  Well, she thinks it's on the stage so we'll go look there.  And sure enough, there is a black hoodie off to the side.  But is it mine?  I mean, it's been 3 weeks and there sure are a lot of hoodies around.  I wouldn't want to take someone else's.  So we're looking at it, trying to determine if there's anything on it that says - hey, I'm yours!  So I check the pockets.  Nothing in the first one.  Try the next.  And there it is.  The Pearson's Mint Pattie my son gave me a month ago.  :)  He's so awesome!

Welcome home black hoodie!

Friday, February 11, 2011

Make My Day

Doing what I do certainly doesn't pay as much as say, I don't know, what I earned 10 years ago (aren't you suppose to make more as you get older?  ha ha)  but there certainly are some benefits money can't buy.  Here are some moments that help make it worth while:

"Tamra, sometimes when I'm not at your house I miss you."

"You make the bestest oatmeal in the whole world!"

"aa-ma, I uv ew"

A 13 month old that looks at you from across the room, breaks into a grin, and then runs and throws herself into your arms.

"Mom, when I grow up I'm gonna be a babysitter just like you."

And my preteen son who still thinks it's cool to make little ones laugh.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

That's right - admire my age

At the end of our conversation, I told my daughter - 
"Well my daughter, you have youth on your side.  That's a good thing." 

Her retort, "Ya, but mom, you have oldness on your side!"

Wednesday, February 9, 2011


Just thinking about how all of you helped make my husband's birthday awesome by texting / calling (or both) and wishing him a happy birthday.  And all of the funny ways of doing it.  And that he probably had over 100 texts & messages.  Yup, he knows he's loved and was quite "happy birthday-fied".   :)   You guys rock.  Thanks!

Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Rubber Bands

Little guy (age 3) likes rubber bands.  He just wears them around his wrist, hasn't figured out how to flip people -yet - so it's all good for now.  Since we get the newspaper, there is a daily supply for him.  Every now and then the rubber band will be blue, which is his ultimate favorite.  Yesterday his last blue rubber band broke.  Instead of throwing it away, he puts it on the counter - which is a sign for the magic fairy to fix it please.  :)

Today's newspaper just happen to have a blue rubber band around it.  So this morning when he sees the new rubber band he looks at me and proclaims, "Hey!  You fixed it!"

Monday, February 7, 2011

I Am Talented

You know you've got some talent when you can keep a 13 month old happy in one arm and with the other put on eye liner & mascera.

Sunday, February 6, 2011

An old email

Still funny:

The other day I went downtown to run a few errands.  I went into the local donut shop for a snack.  I was only there for about 5 minutes, and when I came out, there was this cop writing out a parking ticket.  I said to him, "Come on, man, how about giving a retired person a break?"

He ignored me and continued writing the ticket. His insensitivity annoyed me, so I called him a 'Nazi.' He glared at me and then wrote out another ticket for having worn tires.  So I proceeded to call him a 'doughnut eating Gestapo.'  He finished the second ticket and put it on the windshield with the first.  Then he wrote a third ticket when I called him a moron in blue.

This went on for about 20 minutes.  The more I talked back to him the more tickets he wrote.

Personally, I didn't really care.  I came downtown on the bus, and the car that he was putting the tickets on had one of those bumper stickers that said, 'Obama in '08.'

I try to have a little fun each day now that I'm retired.  The doctor tells me that it's important to my health.

Saturday, February 5, 2011


Today our plans got changed and we end up driving in an area I don't ever recall being in before.  While stopped at a red light, there is a store with a bunch of legs in it.  I mean - there are a LOT of legs in this window!  I tell Dustin, "Hey look!  They must really like The Christmas Story!"  (the movie with the leg lamp)  As the words are half way out of my mouth, I look up and see in HUGE letters, "Prosthetics".  Oops.

Friday, February 4, 2011


Little guy (3) tells me as he's pulling on one individual strand of hair.  "I'm gonna get a hair cut."
Then he pulls on a different strand, "And this one ... (switches to another strand) ... and this one ... "

Thursday, February 3, 2011

Most Upset

There's a little guy that's here that is most upset (tears and all) because - he can't lick his tongue.

Wednesday, February 2, 2011

He remembers

If you recall a few weeks back about the older boy (4) telling the younger boy (3) that they don't have any muscles, well the 3 year old remembers and this is what he tells me - in 'just a matter of fact' tone:

As he's jumping on one foot, "Look what I can do, but (the 4 year old) can't because he doesn't have strong muscles."

Tuesday, February 1, 2011


Me to a 3 year old boy, "Will you close that door behind you please?"

The little guy looks at me, turns around, looks at the door and takes off running the short 3 feet between him and the door.  He leans into it and SLAM!  ...the door is shut.

He turns and looks at me with his chin slightly down and the most proud look on his face, a "yeah, that's right" smile, eyes twinkling and all and confidently tell me, "I'm strong, hu!"